Gloom, Despair and Agony on Me

"So there I was in half-pipe, pullin off some knarly shredage, when..." Okay, I'll stop right there. A first has come about in my life; at the ripe old age of 32 I received my first broken bone. I went snowboarding on Thursday and busted my arm. It was the Lunar New Year, all the Koreans were busy eating kimchi with loved ones so the slopes were empty. This caused me to get overexcited and use a bit too much speed and carelessness in the half-pipe and here I am now, nothin but a busted up waygook.

The emergency room was slightly traumatic as most emergency rooms are, but made more so that it was in Korea. Combined, the three doctors who took care of me had the English ability of a functioning two-year old. Most doctors around here speak fairly good English, but the day I went in was the Lunar New Year's Day, the biggest holiday in Korea. I have a feeling I got the newbies. They did a good job though. The only problem was they couldn't really talk to me and prepare me for anything. When they went to set the bone one doctor, with no warning, grabbed me by the elbow and took a wide stance. The other doctor grabbed my hand and got ready to pull. I just looked up with a horrified expression and thought, Wait, they're not actually going to-- and then they pulled. Actually that part wasn't too bad. It was when they pushed down on the arm that I lost it. The doctor I visited yesterday told me they did a good job though. He showed me the x-rays, explained everything to me and told me that basically I'm screwed for four weeks.

It's funny though, I've had plenty of instances as a kid where it seems like I should have broken something, but I was more prone to stitches than anything else. In the past I've tended to bounce or bust open on impact. Now I tend to crack and stay where I've landed in a busted heap. It feels as though something has been taken from me. I always was able to brag that I didn't break. Now there's another chink in the ego armor, a scar to remind that I'm really not immortal.

Still this incident is slightly laughable were it not for one thing, a trip to Bali. This Friday I leave on my long awaited trip. Bali, the land of surfing, swimming, diving, scooter trips and I don't get to do any of it. Oh dear reader, do not think this irony is lost on me: an outdoors loving man is disabled in an outdoor activity that enables him only to watch people from the beach enjoying other outdoor activities. Damn, that's all there is to say, damn.

Still I can't moan too much (actually I can) but it was 14 degrees this morning (-10C) so Bali is still welcome. Some other random musings:

- I feel kind of helpless at times not speaking the language to well over here and such. Now I get to see what that feels like without the use of my right arm as well.

- Using chopsticks with my left hand is not as difficult as previously thought. Neither is writing on the board.

-The cast is already getting stinky. The Internet suggests baking soda and foot powder.

- It's tough to find Hee Haw clips on the Internet.

-Typing like this sucks. I'm going to stop.