A Great Name for a Band: The Fire Eggs
I wish there was some big exciting event to write about, however, things have slowed down as of late. The weather is getting colder and it's more inviting to stay inside and try to put on a layer of fat on before hibernation. "Watch as the Northen Waygook consumes copeous amounts of potato chips and beer while lying prone on the couch to conserve his energy for the upcoming months." I've been watching too many nature shows.
I do have some more interesting and slightly raunchy insights into the Korean language though. (And honestly, what insight is interesting that isn't slightly raunchy?) I asked some of the Korean teachers awhile back how to say mushroom because I'd like to know how to say that I'd like more mushrooms at a restaurant; Korea is the land of awesome mushrooms by the way. The K teachers told me it was "Pa-Sat"; however, I messed up the pronunciation and said, "Pa-Sa". They then informed me that I had just used the impolite, command form to say, "Take off your clothes!" I might have had trouble remembering "Pa-Sat" as mushroom, but once I knew how close it was to telling someone to take off their clothes, I never forgot it. For those of you advanced learners, "Pa-sa joo-se-yo," is, "Take your clothes off please."
I also learned that "fire-eggs" is the literal translation of Korean to English for testicles. Please don't think that I go around pointing at various body parts and ask people how to say them in Korean. I might have done this at 27, but not at the ripe old age of 31. I actually learned this through a random conversation. I was talking to some of the other foreign teachers and one person said, "It hit me right in the fire eggs."
"Fire-eggs, what's that?" I enquired, "I always hear the kids say that."
"Fire-eggs is the literal translation for balls."
I snickered like I always do when I hear anyone mention anything about genitalia, but I was also laughing at the fact the testies are called fire eggs. I know the translation for a man's genitalia in Spanish is eggs, "huevos", but Koreans' take it one step further and add "fire" to the whole thing. Pretty humorous if you ask me, but then I recalled a game I had played with kids a few days before. I divided the kids into two groups, boys and girls, and asked them to choose names for their teams. The girls chose something sweet, like The Five Princesses, but the boys chose The Fire Eggs, and not knowing what it meant, I allowed them to keep their name and wrote it on the board. I unintentionally allowed the boys to name themselves The Testicles. Thank goodness no Korean teacher or Higher-Ups from the office came in. Come to think of it, I wonder what "five princesses" means now.
Below are pics that have nothing to do with the aforementioned subjects (thank god). My old camera had a scratch on the lens, and I didn't dig it very much so I bought myself an early Christmas present, a Canon S2IS. It is now part of the family. Enjoy.
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Tombstones
I always feel uncomfortable taking pictures in cemetaries, if only beacuse I don't want to offend anyone; however, these things- how people choose to honor living and dying really show a country's culture. Welcome to Korea's culture. (Also look out for the Korean ghost-- the slight blur in the photo. A.K.A. the lens scratch.)
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Waygooks at a Wedding
About a month ago, good friends Warren and Ashley got married and invited yours truly to attend. Warren, being from Canada, invited many of his waygook friends and family and we participated in the festivities. I, along with seven other foreigners, had the privilege and honor of carrying one of the two cart/throne contraptions that contained either the bride or the groom. I was forewarned about this task, but I was overjoyed that I was considered worthy of participating in the wedding and entrusted with carrying one of the betrothed; however, I thought this would be a relatively easy feat. I, along with three other strapping white guys, would carry the throne contraption containing the bride approximately 15-20 feet down a carpeted aisle and that was that. No, life had more in store for us than that. First we had to carry the bride and groom approximately six times the distance estimated, uphill, with a switchback. At one point the wedding procession took a time-out so we could hoist the cart/throne doohicky to our shoulders so we could tackle the switchback. The Korean ring leader told us to go slow and then kept stepping frantically on our heels. The hats we were wearing didn't help either. They kept falling off, despite being tied around our chins (see pics below).
I make the procession sound like a painful process, and while it wasn't easy, it was very rewarding to be part of something like that. When I first came to Korea I had a lot of doubts. Doubts about whether I would like the experience, doubts about whether the students would like me, doubts about whether I would like the students. Basically I was worried about not being accepted; however, my worries were ill-founded and being invited to take part in something special and very unique was wonderful. I was happy to take part in the wedding of my two friends.
Afterwards there was the traditional reception and drinks followed by more drinks at the romantically named "Road King" bar. It was a great time and I wish Warren and Ashley all the best.
About a month ago, good friends Warren and Ashley got married and invited yours truly to attend. Warren, being from Canada, invited many of his waygook friends and family and we participated in the festivities. I, along with seven other foreigners, had the privilege and honor of carrying one of the two cart/throne contraptions that contained either the bride or the groom. I was forewarned about this task, but I was overjoyed that I was considered worthy of participating in the wedding and entrusted with carrying one of the betrothed; however, I thought this would be a relatively easy feat. I, along with three other strapping white guys, would carry the throne contraption containing the bride approximately 15-20 feet down a carpeted aisle and that was that. No, life had more in store for us than that. First we had to carry the bride and groom approximately six times the distance estimated, uphill, with a switchback. At one point the wedding procession took a time-out so we could hoist the cart/throne doohicky to our shoulders so we could tackle the switchback. The Korean ring leader told us to go slow and then kept stepping frantically on our heels. The hats we were wearing didn't help either. They kept falling off, despite being tied around our chins (see pics below).
I make the procession sound like a painful process, and while it wasn't easy, it was very rewarding to be part of something like that. When I first came to Korea I had a lot of doubts. Doubts about whether I would like the experience, doubts about whether the students would like me, doubts about whether I would like the students. Basically I was worried about not being accepted; however, my worries were ill-founded and being invited to take part in something special and very unique was wonderful. I was happy to take part in the wedding of my two friends.
Afterwards there was the traditional reception and drinks followed by more drinks at the romantically named "Road King" bar. It was a great time and I wish Warren and Ashley all the best.
Damn these Hats
The rest of the Korean garb was cool, but what's up with the hats? They're too small to really find purchase on one's head, the chin strap itches, they definately don't keep out the sun, and they give you the worst case of bonnet hair when you take them off. They only thing they do well is annoy and fall off of craniums.
Also pictured is the royal wedding carriage for the bride powered by waygooks.
Also pictured is the royal wedding carriage for the bride powered by waygooks.
You Want Me to do What With That Chicken?
I'm not really sure why there was a chicken in the ceremony. I know a duck is symbolic of good luck and long life. Maybe a chicken is better than a duck, plus chicken tastes better.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
The Categorizing of Last Weeks Events
Many things happened last week. Here they are, categorized in no specific order.
The Fixing of the Internet
The Internet is fixed. Don't ask me how. I am still confused.
The Leaving of Scott and Al
The long dreaded day arrived on Saturday morning when Scott and Allison took off for Nepal. Allison will trek while Scott will impersonate a Yeti. The pictures will be interesting. I'm planning on meeting up with them in Thailand in December for some scuba diving and laying out in the sun. Still, life around here isn't the same. Who will order pizza for me? In a style befitting both Scott and Al's time here, I have written an essay on the topic of "What my friends mean to me," in the words of a young ESL learner.
Scot and Alison be my friend.
Upon Sunday in a morning we order of the pizza,
Because on Saturday we drinks of the beer,
And pizza is of making us feel gooder.
We likes to being watching a videos and hiking in the tree, and laughing on the people.
We sings on the No-reh-bong and at the Type O Negative and the I Mother Earth.
I feels of the time that things are the beautiful and funny be.
But upon the Saturdays they drive the plane in the sky.
And gone to the land of mountain and ices are these.
Sad am I but happy be.
Amen.
The Forced March
I am a firm believer that the best optimists are the pessimists. If you expect things to be bad then more often than not you're pleasantly surprised when things aren't as bad as fore casted. Some may say that this is setting the bar low. I say the bar sucks and then I am surprised to find that the bar is prettier and not as ugly as I thought. I know, that's a rather obscure analogy.
This is all leading up to the Annual Avalon Hiking Trip that occurred this Saturday. This is also leading up to me eating my words and admitting that the trip was not as bad as I had feared it would be. Yes, there was the waking up early in the morning and standing in lines and waiting around and getting yelled at in Korean. However, the hike was actually very beautiful and there was very little forced community bonding. Everyone was free to move at their own pace and stick with whomever they chose. For a forced outing it wasn't half bad.
Halloween?
Halloween came and went. I tried to instill some Halloween spirit in my students and really, that isn't too hard to do with nine year old children. They're content to pretend that they're monsters any day of the year, so on that special day we cut out masks, they had to say "trick or treat", explain what their mask was about and then I doled out candy. It was fun all the same, but it wasn't like the Halloween's at home. Understandably because I'm in Korea, but still, these kids don't know what they're missing out on. Do you know how much loot a kid could get here if they tackled one of the twenty story apartment buildings? This place is an untapped gold mine.
Kat did buy a pumpkin, which was unexpected and pretty cool. she carved it, while I drank wine, commented on her carving skills and cautioned her on the use of her sharp knife. There's a scary story. After that we put on the scariest movie we could find, "The Corpse Bride" and laughed ourselves to sleep. Halloween could have been worse.
The Arrival of the Newbies
Two new guys started work last week, Nathan and Jeff. They are welcomed.
The Arrival of Misty
Kat's sister Misty arrived on Saturday and we all welcomed her.
The Arrival of Cold Weather
Cold weather arrived on Monday and we all welcomed it. Kind of.
Pics of related events follow:
Many things happened last week. Here they are, categorized in no specific order.
The Fixing of the Internet
The Internet is fixed. Don't ask me how. I am still confused.
The Leaving of Scott and Al
The long dreaded day arrived on Saturday morning when Scott and Allison took off for Nepal. Allison will trek while Scott will impersonate a Yeti. The pictures will be interesting. I'm planning on meeting up with them in Thailand in December for some scuba diving and laying out in the sun. Still, life around here isn't the same. Who will order pizza for me? In a style befitting both Scott and Al's time here, I have written an essay on the topic of "What my friends mean to me," in the words of a young ESL learner.
Scot and Alison be my friend.
Upon Sunday in a morning we order of the pizza,
Because on Saturday we drinks of the beer,
And pizza is of making us feel gooder.
We likes to being watching a videos and hiking in the tree, and laughing on the people.
We sings on the No-reh-bong and at the Type O Negative and the I Mother Earth.
I feels of the time that things are the beautiful and funny be.
But upon the Saturdays they drive the plane in the sky.
And gone to the land of mountain and ices are these.
Sad am I but happy be.
Amen.
The Forced March
I am a firm believer that the best optimists are the pessimists. If you expect things to be bad then more often than not you're pleasantly surprised when things aren't as bad as fore casted. Some may say that this is setting the bar low. I say the bar sucks and then I am surprised to find that the bar is prettier and not as ugly as I thought. I know, that's a rather obscure analogy.
This is all leading up to the Annual Avalon Hiking Trip that occurred this Saturday. This is also leading up to me eating my words and admitting that the trip was not as bad as I had feared it would be. Yes, there was the waking up early in the morning and standing in lines and waiting around and getting yelled at in Korean. However, the hike was actually very beautiful and there was very little forced community bonding. Everyone was free to move at their own pace and stick with whomever they chose. For a forced outing it wasn't half bad.
Halloween?
Halloween came and went. I tried to instill some Halloween spirit in my students and really, that isn't too hard to do with nine year old children. They're content to pretend that they're monsters any day of the year, so on that special day we cut out masks, they had to say "trick or treat", explain what their mask was about and then I doled out candy. It was fun all the same, but it wasn't like the Halloween's at home. Understandably because I'm in Korea, but still, these kids don't know what they're missing out on. Do you know how much loot a kid could get here if they tackled one of the twenty story apartment buildings? This place is an untapped gold mine.
Kat did buy a pumpkin, which was unexpected and pretty cool. she carved it, while I drank wine, commented on her carving skills and cautioned her on the use of her sharp knife. There's a scary story. After that we put on the scariest movie we could find, "The Corpse Bride" and laughed ourselves to sleep. Halloween could have been worse.
The Arrival of the Newbies
Two new guys started work last week, Nathan and Jeff. They are welcomed.
The Arrival of Misty
Kat's sister Misty arrived on Saturday and we all welcomed her.
The Arrival of Cold Weather
Cold weather arrived on Monday and we all welcomed it. Kind of.
Pics of related events follow:
Pretty
The hike was beautiful and peaceful at times. Keep in mind that there were about three hundred hikers behind me when I took this picture.
Map of Little Use
"Smile and act like you know where we are." This map was neat but it doesn't help out when you don't know where you started, where you are, and where you are going.
Special Ed Freaks Out
Kat got a pumpkin and dubbed him Edward. I said he was a special pumpkin and thus he became Special Ed. He's a spastic sort of pumpkin.
Now What am I Supposed to do with the Glowing Orb?
I am confused by the pumpkin and how hairy my arms can appear at times.
Beware of "It"
I ripped this obscure warning label off of something. Now there is somewhere out there using "it" without being warned. I'll let you guess what "it" is.
Rices
When I'm bored on weekends I take the Eagle (my bike) out for a spin and see what I can find. The highlights tend to be Buddhist temples and rice fields. Pictured is one of the two.
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